We all have expectations with ourselves. With the expectations I setup for myself when it came to bringing art back into my life, I have come out very disappointed.
I wanted to draw more and work on my webcomic side project. I wanted to expand my skills and knowledge. I also wanted to promote myself so I could do commissions. I wanted to be able to further myself so I could share the stories that are in my head. I wanted to do a lot.
I also had to find a job, and this took up a lot of my time. I am also fantastic at making excuses to myself when it comes to these projects I want to do. I’m too tired, oh it’s too late, my internet is out what would I reference, I’d rather watch netflix, maybe I should go outside, I should clean, I should do laundry, etc etc. Often they usually weren’t much better than just “Meh…”.
It took me many months, but I have found a job for myself. The job is working out very well and I am very happy with it. I was hoping with the finding of a job, that I could then use my free time after work to start working on my art again. Again the excuses would come up. Usually the “too tired” excuses.
Well, I am hoping to turn that around. My declaration is 1 new comic a week and 1 new painting a week. Hopefully I will be able to ramp that up to something more frequent, but if I can at least hold myself to this schedule, then I can make some progress. I am making this description very vague, for if I decide to do just a sketchy looking comic strip, I will accept this, as long as I DO it. The painting can be a quick one or it can be a highly detailed one, again as long as I DO it, that is all that matters.
I need to build the habits and the mindset, which is personally one of the hardest things for me to do. It’s too easy to brush things off when you can just screw around instead. For too long have I come home for the day and just played around on video games as my go to de-stresser.
I’ve already started to modify and update my layouts. Things were looking pretty sad for my comic website layout and it was really bothering me. I’ll be going through and trimming and updating things as I go.
I will do this, I will change this part of me. There is no try, only do. If I ever want to get to those millions of projects I “want to do someday” I have to start working towards them now. There are too many excuses in this world, and I am an expert at finding them.
It’s time to change.